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Woe isn't You.

For the sake of easy categorization, I'm going to make broad generalization of creating two scenarios of victimization (which is sure to ruffle some feathers).

In the first category is the victim of external circumstances (i.e. worldly effects impacted me in x, y, or z way). This individual has habitually trained his/her mind to effectively assign blame due to the unfair weather or unpredicted traffic for causing their tardiness, as an example. To follow this, usually, there is a development of a framework referred to as the snowball effect. This snowball effect allows for an enabling of supportive evidence through environmental feedback to provide the individual with, what the fitness industry calls "proprioception" - a term that allows some sort of biofeedback to reinforce movement patterns. This, instead, is translated to an emotional form of biofeedback and story-telling wherein the world is seemingly "out to get them". Additionally, I'm going to speculate that this person is the same one that complains the most out of all of your friends (or, on the other side of the coin, maybe it's you). Now, one assumption that [I believe] we can agree upon is that this person is simply unentertaining to be around... some may call it a drag just to be around them venting on about how their "5 minutes late to work was because the line at Starbucks was too long".

The contrasting individual in this situation is the embodiment of consequences following action. This individual believes that, for every decision, there is a likely benefit or consequence that follows. For simple terming, we'll call this second-exampled person a non-victim. Let me give an example that's relatable to the paragraph above, to best compare and contrast: rather than blaming the line at Starbucks for being too long, this person, as an example, concludes their complaint with a solution-based ending that might sound something like:

1) I should have left the house five minutes earlier.

2) Maybe I'll make plans to mobile order next time.

3) I'm going to make my coffee at home from now on.

This problem-solving ability is surely not innate - after all, there have been studies done about the brainwave activity that goes on after presented with an issue and being able to solve the distressing puzzle - which have long-term benefits to cognition.

Most of us, as humans, find ourselves somewhere in the middle between the two types of personalities listed above. I want to take this one step further and stake a claim that the world would be a more pleasant place to live and spend your time if we all make moves toward a direction of non-victim-hood.

The challenge that comes with this post is the deep work that's required to shift your predetermined destiny to an outcome that is more favorable for you, the practitioner of life. If things are going to happen in a way where you are unable to control, why not control the things that you can? After all, shouldn't we make better use of our time?

The next time you find yourself complaining about how "Charles at the front desk took forever to check my ID", leave five minutes earlier.

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